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Occasionally I wandered in where I was not wanted and gave truthful answers.
Sometimes I even did it deliberately. A little disruption now can prevent disaster later.
thinking by blogging

Judge not by the label

But for me, politics is not a part of paganism. Things don't go well when faith and politics are mixed. So I am saying that politics has nothing to do with the sunrise of the bright Moon. You can't find politics in an infant's laugh or in the call of a coyote.

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Intelligence

Consider the holiness of your hands. They are how you do your work on this earth; they are a microcosm of the hands of the Goddess, and can change the world as easily as hers can.
— Dianne Sylvan
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Journal - Friday, 23Nov2018

Thinking by blogging
Well, I didn't quite meet my goals this week. I didn't get thirteen entires to the lexicon. I did manage quite a bit else though.

I got into a long online discussion concerning the assumptions that people bring from their religion into their lives and what they expect of others. In passing, I mentioned some of the differences between a Story and a Journey.

It dawned on me that right now the "pagan community" has a lot of people who want to write the story for others instead of setting them off on their own journey. I'm going to have to think about that some.

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Journal - Friday, 16Nov2018

Thinking by blogging
I like mind games.

I used to have a very religious and very superstitious neighbor. One thing that would freak him out was the number thirteen. So when I started doing stuff on the net, I threw in thirteens whenever I could. Even today, I do the same. Three thirteens is thirty-nine, that's the number of entries you'll find on the front pages of my blogs. On this blog, when you hover over one of the internal links that coded, it grows to 113% of it's normal size. The margins on my quote boxes are thirteen pixels. And so on.

There are just all sorts of thirteens in my blogs. And there are about to be more.

Starting this week, I'm setting some goals. Thirteen articles revived. Thirteen lexicon entries added. And thirteen quotes on Wednesdays.

I use other numbers too of course. Threes. Fives, Sevens.

But there is a part of me that can't help speculating what my former neighbor would say if he knew I was deliberately putting all these thirteens out into the world and on the net. It brings a smile.

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Technopagan retreat

That sacred space of conscience where you can exercise your rights in terms of religious freedom and deeply-held, reasonable beliefs is the core of human dignity. In fact, that's the basis for civilization itself. And when you lose that fundamental principle... you have no basis on which to build.
— Jeff Fortenberry
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Journal - Friday, 09Nov2018

Anything in the Gallery or albums has to have grabbed my attention. That usually means it has to be unusual.

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Journal - Friday, 02Nov2018

Looking for Paganism in films

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Journal - Friday, 26Oct2018

Thinking by blogging
This last week I've been polishing the behind the scenes stuff on this blog. That includes cleaning up the formatting for my quotes & thinkums. There's a goof in 2017 that's throwing things off, but I will find and fix it. I've been reading my old stuff. I've been cross referencing. Most of it isn't obvious.

Mom isn't doing so well. She forgets things. She's having a harder time moving around. We'll see.

One of my biggest frustrations is sex. One companion passed and the other moved. I try to avoid casual sex these days and I don't do the pickup scene at all. The younger women aren't interested in an older guy, especially the kind that makes them think. The older available ladies, well, many are into the victimhood thing. Some of the others want a bad boy. When they find out I am pagan, they think danger and blood and risk. Usually that's not me. I used to have sex six or seven times a week and now it's once or twice on a good week. I'm horny in an age of #MeToo and regret equalling rape accusations. I'm not sure how to fix that.

Truth is winning in a small way. I've been finding people that I agree with online. Of course it will never be a massive or even an impressive number, but there's hope for Isaiah's Job yet. I serve veritas, that has it's own rewards. Widespread recognition for my, um, obvious insights and grand wisdom is not one of them. I'm pretty good, but it won't bring fame and money. Still, it's nice to stumble across some like minded folk here and there. Wisdom is where you find it.

It dawned on me that I can save time by copy-pasting the source code from the quotes & thinkums blog entries in my comments. I'll have to eliminate the <div class="offset"> and the following </div>, but the rest shows up in Disqus just fine. Not with all the bells and whistles, true, but with enough to show it's a blockquote. I sill may have to toss in some <em> and </em>, but it works.

Time for a shower. Then I'll greet the sunrise while sharing breakfast with my raven friend. Then over to check on Mom.
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Journal - Friday, October 12, 2018

Thinking by blogging
It's been a while since I've done a journal entry,

This week I'm really proud of two things. I came up with a definition of "wise" that is practical and better than anything I found in online dictionaries.

And I managed to separate sexuality from politics. I've been trying to do that for years, decades. Our culture took something that is about sharing and coming together and shoved it into tribalism. The labels aren't important unless you're trying to make fun political.

So I had to come up with something that described sexuality without tribalism.

Unless it's with me, who you have sex with, how you have sex, and how many times you have sex is frankly none of my business. Likewise, unless it is sex with me, I'm not responsible for the consequences.
That was the beginning, and now I've got a definition I can point at. If you haven't already, take a look at my lexicon sex index.

I don't know how we made sex about politics. But from now on I'm going to do my damnedest to make it responsibly fun and only fun.

Paraphrasing from The Ethical Slut and my lexicon definition, “Sex is nice and pleasure is good for you.”

I think it's a mistake to suppress our biology in the name of politics.

I'm going to look at pretty girls and women. I'll flirt unless it makes them uncomfortable. If the lady is unpledged and willing, I may fuck her if I can.

And yes, some clothing sexualizes and objectifies women. It's also something that they choose to wear. Which means they are flirting too. They want to be looked at.

I'm going to enjoy sex. I'm going to talk about sex ethically. Sex is a gift from the Divine and I am going to treat it that way.

Politics doesn't belong in sex.
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Journal 15May2018

Thinking by blogging
This is both my Tuesday entry and a journal entry.

I've had three deaths in the past month. One a friend, one an uncle, and one person who I did not get along with.

I really don't think these "poor little me" bits are healthy, but my blogging took a hit and I wanted people to know why. Since my companion passed last fall, I'm not dealing well with people I know passing.

The friend wasn't a close friend, just someone I had known for a long time.

My uncle was my mother's older brother. You know that old story about the oldest son being allowed to get away with anything because he was the older son? That was my uncle. He was the troublemaker. Still, he did things mostly right. He gave the world two sons and laid the groundwork for many grandchildren. He was a party guy, but he'd bend over backwards and jump for family and his friends. This was the guy who'd take you fishing and hunting and then help you bury bodies.

And then there was the other person. We kept bumping into each other over the years. There were a few epic arguments. I can't blame it all on her. She did win in the end though. She left special instructions that I be invited to the funeral. What was I supposed to do with that? Say no? Tell her family that I couldn't be bothered?

People passing makes me think of mortality. I'm my mother's caregiver and I worry about her. But I worry about me too. I can't hike and walk like I used to, my feet don't like me and I don't like them. I can hear my joints rubbing against each other, especially in my neck. My handwriting has gotten worse. There are days it hurts too much to type. I spend more time than I should coughing up phlegm. I don't sleep particularly well and that makes me even more paranoid. I'm getting older and I don't think it will end well. My family is long lived but I'm not sure.

These toxic politics have made things worse. I see pagans more interested in making their mark than in nurturing the Earth. I see devotion to the gods replaced by tribal identity. I see the endless oneupmanship and "gotcha" attacks. I see us concentrating on our differences rather than what we share. And I think I have been too big a part of that.

The sun still rose this morning. It was particularly gorgeous, but I only noticed after I took the trash out. I stopped to think then, I had not greeted the sun in more than a month. Thoughts of death pushed thoughts of dawn out of my head. Only happenstance made me notice. That's not who I want to be. That's not what I want to share.

I still have time. I do not know how much. But some.
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Journal 23Mar2018

I try to give Christians the benefit of the doubt, mainly because I expect the same. Some make it harder than others. Live and let live works mostly.

For space reasons, this entry has it's own page.

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Journal 16Mar2018

My paganism isn't separate. It's not something enshrined in the past behind a glass door in some museum. It's a living part of me and my world.

And it's going to shape my future.
— NeoWayland, Thursday at last
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Journal 09Mar2018

Thinking by blogging
So here I sit, putting my mental house in order.

A little sketching. A lot of reading. Listening to music.

I've been so wrapped up in politics, paganism, and taking care of Mom that I didn't let my wheels spin for me.

I'm feeling more of myself.

Splitting focus really helps. But it helps even more indulging in both fiction and non-fiction. Even if the fiction is old favorites I've not read in a while.

Reading is a dying art, especially the way I do it.

I've been thinking about many things in the last few days. But I don't think I'll share them. More stuff for the private journal.
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Journal 02Mar2018

Thinking by blogging
One thing that cropped up a lot lately online is the idea that "we" have to win, and the only REAL way to win is by eradicating "them."

All or nothing. Win at all costs. The only way to succeed is to do away with anything else.

Conservative or liberal, pagan or Christian, city or rural, it doesn't seem to matter. "They" must be vanquished, exiled, destroyed for "us" to win.

But veritas comes out. Because if the only way for "them" to win is by Total Eradication, doesn't that mean that as long as one small spark exists, they didn't win? If the only was for "us" to win is by otal Eradication, doesn't that mean that as long as one small spark exists, we didn't win?

It goes deeper than that of course. It goes back to borders. In order for any side to progress, ideas have to be mixed. It's where ideas evolve. It's where change happens.

It's where magick happens.

We need those ideas that we totally disagree with. We need truths that make us uncomfortable. We need challenges that we can't meet alone.

It's the mix, it's the argument, it's the conflict that will give us some of our best new ideas. And almost all of the bad new ideas too.

We've no way of knowing which is which until we've tried them. All we know for sure is that our old ideas don't always fit our new circumstances.

Eradication isn't the answer. That's not where the Spark of Inspiration lies.

But some disagreement, some need, some faith, and the willingness to try something else, that gives miracles. Messy miracles, but still miracles.

Just something to think about.
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Journal 23Feb2018

I saw a horse "broke" once. It was time consuming. It was brutal. That was enough to convince me it was wrong.

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Journal 16Feb2018

If Music is a Place -- then Jazz is the City, Folk is the Wilderness, Rock is the Road, Classical is a Temple.
— Vera Nazarian
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Journal 02Feb2018

Thinking by blogging

I need a break from the nonsense.

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Journal 26Jan2018

“Ursula K. Le Guin, acclaimed for her fantasy fiction, is dead at 88”

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Journal 19Jan2018

Links to the TWH comment threads on Gavin Frost and Kenny Klein

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Journal 12Jan2018

I don't approve of older men having sex with young teens, but it has been happening from the beginning.

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Journal 15Dec2017

Where to find out what's happening.

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Journal 08Dec2017

When someone starts talking about THE truth, it's to exclude the thoughts and ideas they find uncomfortable.

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Journal 01Dec2017

These older blog entries have been reformatted and entered into the current directories

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Journal 23Nov2017

Lately when my mind turns to politics

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Journal 19Nov2017

Moore put a Decalogue monument in court. At night. With very few people knowing until the next day. Moore is on record as saying that man's law is under God's law. That is not something you want to hear a judge say, especially when you don't share his religion.

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Journal 17Nov2017

waning crescent moon       Lady in the Court of Shadows       Leonids Meteor Shower       🌬 breezy

Thinking by blogging

It's hard to find energy so I can do things.

Today I was up at three a.m. The insomnia wasn't the only reason. I needed to do a pass through in the kitchen. The dishes were piled up, the floor needed sweeping and mopping. The pest control guy was coming at eight. Usually he comes on the last Friday in the month, but this month that's the day after Thanksgiving.

I've been watching the wind and breeze this morning. It's the first breezy day around here in a while. I wonder how many leaves will be left. I live in the high desert, but here in town it doesn't always look it. It's suburban.

My raven friend wants his blueberries. He gets raspberries today.

I'm still working on updating the site. I don't have much energy to spare. I'm thinking I'll get back to regular blogging after the first of the year.

The politics is getting to me. But there is one song that brings it all home. So I'm going to post the lyrics.

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Jounal 13Nov2017

Personal’s not the same as important. People just think it is.
— Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies
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Journal 25Aug2017

pagan festival season       Mercury retrograde       🌙 waxing crescent moon

Thinking by blogging>

This site never had that many visitors, I never planned for that. Even though I think some of my stuff is pretty good, I held back from putting it out on display. I had a couple of bad years and I stopped blogging. These days my regular readers don't comment very much.

I'm a solitary, Most of my celebrations and rituals are done alone. It's not that I want to, it's just that my established group experience hasn't been very positive. One thing this means is that if my gods aren't chiming in, the only voice I'm hearing is mine. This isn't good. We need our ideas tested by those we trust but may not agree with. So if I want to grow, I have to share what I've learned. Since I work mostly with words and spell-forms in those words, I can't take something to the festival and spread it out.

But I forget. Not everyone has the same tools in their mental toolbox that I do. Sometimes the tools are called different names. Sometimes the toolbox is organized differently. And because I'm used to the things I do and the way I do things, I don't always notice when the tools are worn out and don't quite do the job I expect. I make excuses, I put off trying something new.

Lately when my articles have been good enough, I've experimented with posting links at reddit. The response has been a little mixed.

Part of the problem is my old friend, the symbol mismatch. What I see as practicing paganism today isn't necessarily what the rest of the World sees as paganism. I'm talking about gardening, I'm talking about nudging people just a little more towards truth. I'm talking about greeting the sun with nothing but a pendent. Or taking a quiet moon bath in my backyard. It's not fantastic, it's not romantic, it's not mysterious. It's not highly visible. It's not special. It's not meeting at a festival with like-minded people dressed up in costumes ritual garb. It's just me. It's also going to be Tuesday's article.

My in-town companion still isn't doing well. I've been trying to convince her to go to the hospital. I've been checking on her when I can, but she thinks I'm around too much. Helicopter hovering was how I think she put it.

The garden is still giving stuff. Tomatoes, delicious.

Mom is about the same, although she's resenting the control I have over her life. That's a good thing, but very frustrating for the both of us. She turned 75 this month. It's hard to see her moving with a walker, but at least she's moving. And she still has her compassion and her sense of humor. One day after she has passed, I am going to tell her story.

If anything I'm seeing more politics in paganism now. And it's not even clean politics, if there is such a thing. This is people who have been whipped up to a frenzy and told that if they kill the scapegoat, their deepest heart's desire will be granted for by the Forces of History. Pah.

So I think I need to do something special come Redmark. I need to think about that.

Well, there's a tunafish sandwich that does not yet exist, but is still calling my name.

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Journal 11Aug2017

I have no higher authority. I have to persuade.
— NeoWayland
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Jounal 04Aug2017

My companion pointed out to me last night that I've never shown a a picture of my raven pendant on the site.

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Journal 21Jul2017

pagan festival season       AZ monsoon season       waning crescent moon

Thinking by blogging

I had a bit of a scare this week. My blogging program developed a bit of glitch for a while. The idea of having to rebuild five websites and all the connections did not thrill me. This is the fourth major version of the site and it has been tweaked and tweaked again.

When I first started Technopagan Yearnings, I was coding things by hand and I loved arranging HTML modularly. I started using Lifli’s iBlog when I gave TPY and Pagan Vigil their own domains. Since then, Lifli went out of business and I started using RealMac RapidWeaver. I've upgraded from version 5 to version 6 and apparently I should have upgraded to 7.

Things change. As something suitable for the ages, the websites work as they are. As something that I can update and tweak, I need programs to manage. Using something dynamically is different from an unchanging text set in stone. Things change. A good lesson, but I wasn't ready to hear it at 10 p.m. on a Tuesday night after a day of frustration trying to fix the program. I had just gotten my new rhythm in blogging. I didn't want to spend months reconstructing the sites.

I managed a quick trip to Gallup on Wednesday. If you've never been, Gallup is sometimes called the "Heart of Indian Country." There's a lot to see and do there. I was meeting a friend that I hadn't seen in years. He had made a small necklace with red coral. I'm giving it to my companion tomorrow. The red will look excellent on her skin tone.

Speaking of changes, for the first time since the new cable company came to town, I've no cable TV signal and no internet. So as I type this I can't preview and I've no idea when I will be able to post. Hopefully today.

One of my issues with this site and P•V has been providing enough content. That's why I've scaled back the original content and moved this site more to "a slice of life." P•V is now mostly headlines and news clippings. I can't give daily original articles, not and maintain some kind of sanity. Paganism on the web is getting more and more wrapped up with politics and the Great Anti-Trump Crusade. I'm seeing first hand just how poisonous and destructive that is. Not that I support Trump, but removing a legally elected president for no credible reason. This obsession isn't healthy, and it's making some of my pagan friends unravel.

My garden is producing well. Like I've said before, they aren't really your vegetables until you give them away.

Mom is still getting along. She and I are having our disagreements. The other day when I checked on her, we got into discussion on if she should leave things on the stove cooking while she is in the other room. She has ruined one skillet. Bless her heart, when she doesn't see something, she's more likely to forget about it. I want her to be independent for as long as she can, but there are some things I don't think will ever really come back.

Well how about that. I just put in the tag for "Mom" and I thought I would double check the other entries because it came up "mom" instead of "Mom." It seems I use the word "moment" a lot. I didn't realize how much I did.

I suppose I should go do a fast pass through the kitchen and load the dishwasher. Then maybe some breakfast. Then a shower and shave. And then maybe I'll have internet.


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Journal 14Jul2017

From the hairstyle of the brunette lady on the right, I'm guessing that it happened in the late 1960s.

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Journal 07Jul2017

Inside looking out.

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Journal 30Jun2017

pagan festival season       AZ monsoon season       🌛 waxing half moon

Thinking by bloggingI spent some time this week with the man that handles Mom's yard work. That's no easy thing. Mom hasn't been able to work in the yard since the accident, but her yard is still amazing. There's no doubt this lady is the daughter of the Gardner, even if she doesn't grown vegetables.

Way back when the folks first bought their house, there were fruit trees. What Mom didn't know at the time is that you have to spray fruit trees several times a year to keep them from getting infested. So we had a few glorious months with apples plucked fresh from the tree. And then they got wormy.

Ah well. Mom's yard now is just full of flowerbeds and it feeds her soul.

Mine is much more utilitarian. I don't have her gift with flowers.

Yesterday I made time for the full greet the sun ritual. I'm sure my grandfather wouldn't approved of me doing the nekkid pagan guy thing facing the sunrise, but he is the one who taught me about summer sunrises.

I'm typing this on my patio and one of my neighbor's pigeons is giving me the eye. He thinks I owe him food. He's not one of my raven friends, he doesn't get any.

I think I need some breakfast.

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Journal 23Jun2017

This Forest God is definately a Man's Man.

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Journal 05May2017

No, these aren't people I know.

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Journal 28Apr2017

Yes, I know the rhythm is odd. It works though.

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Journal 21Apr2017

Mercury retrograde       waning crescent moon       breezy early morning

Thinking by bloggingI've got my tree-planting spot picked out for next Friday. It's a good one this year and less than half a day's drive.

It's pretty obvious that sex has been on my mind this week. Part of it is me missing my companion who moved (yes, even though the other one is still here), but a bigger part of it is dealing with the fallout from the Klein verdict. It happens every time there's a sex scandal with pagans. I didn't plan to become a pagan sex advisor on ethics, but looking at my writings on sex, that's exactly what I have become.

I wonder if I could take the trade out in actual sex.

It looks like I'm going to be looking closely at the "in your face" paganism again. I'm not exactly comfortable with that, but I suspect that Someone has nudged again. We'll see how it works out.

Speaking of companions, my local one called me early Thursday morning laughing. "He has your
mustache!" She was talking about Adam The Woo, a video blogger we sometimes enjoy with a morning cuddle. He got a haircut.

A very nice lady asked me about the "slice of life" thing again. This blog is more personal than anything else. Yes, I talk about the pagan stuff, but that is only part of who I am. That came up in an online converstation the other day too.

I’m not the pagan guy who lives down the lane, I’m a man who happens to be pagan. Also libertarian, straight, a bit of a mutt, and a passionate bibliophile. Those things are aspects of me, but they don’t define the face I show the World. Mostly those things don’t come into play unless someone demands their beliefs trump mine.

I didn't talk about masks. Maybe I should have. Sometimes it's still hard for me to know when to filter, espeically when I am not looking at their face.

Today I mail out the invites to my Welcome to Summer feast. It's looking like shish-kabobs this year. And of course the highlight is my bi-annual
Hair of the Bear.

Wednesday I was checking on Mom and we got to talking about my
malichite bear. She's the one who gave it to me although she doesn't understand what my pendants mean to me. I know she doesn't understand what my relationship with Bear, Coyote & Raven, but she knows I like bears and bear art.

Speaking of Coyote, my current bathroom book is
Coyote America: A Natural and Supernatural History by Dan Flores and I am really enjoying it.

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Journal 10Apr2017

We pretty much agreed that women sometimes lie about rape and the code needed to take that into account. We added one small paragraph that said accusations of rape didn't necessarily mean rape.
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Journal 07Apr2017

Freedom of religion does not mean deferring to Christianity.
— NeoWayland
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Journal 31Mar2017

I believe in God, only I spell it Nature.
— Frank Lloyd Wright
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What does that have to do with greeting the sun?

I'm winter-born, so a good snow always touches my soul in a quiet joyful way. I could watch it for hours. I did watch it for hours.

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Journal 18Nov2016

Let My worship be in the heart that rejoices, for behold — all acts of love and pleasure are My rituals.
— Doreen Valiente, Charge of the Goddess
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Collecting pelts

Mom ended up with a broken clavicle, a punctured lung, massive bruising, and some confusion.

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Aside for polyamory - revised

Winter-born that I am, I always like a desert snowfall

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This is the world

Fire good, I grunt only half aloud.

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Semi-hermit

I keep my politics separate from my faith

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Today's wonders

How many groups really are about the gods and the magick?

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By Your Own Name

Thinking by blogging

Beware the Egos

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Left handed wave

Season of water

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Pardon me while I blink in the winter sunlight and get my bearings

It's true! It's true! The crown has made it clear.
The climate must be perfect all the year.

A law was made a distant moon ago here:
July and August cannot be too hot.
And there's a legal limit to the snow here
In Camelot.
The winter is forbidden till December
And exits March the second on the dot.
By order, summer lingers through September
In Camelot.

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Right or Write

Another reason why the peace-love-freedom-happiness bit annoys me

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Transcending the label

The "fastest growing" becomes one of the fastest collapsing

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Sunfell Tech Mage Rede Nine Words Serve The Tech Mage Best Keep What Works Fix What’s Broke Ditch The Rest

A narrow slice of life, but now and again pondering American neopaganism, modern adult pagans & the World.

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